Specialist?

I have been thinking and some might say that is my problem.

I have been thinking about how the older I get the less I am certain of and then I thought about specialists. Those that spend years learning more and more about less and less until they know everything about nothing. Or so the old joke goes.

I almost sense that there is coming some sort of crisis or perhaps an "AHA!" moment in my life. Those times when suddenly something you have studied or thought about or searched through becomes very clear. It seems all at once you know without a doubt what seemed to be confusing beyond reason before. Either that or I am just going in a muddle and in a circle and may find I end up meeting myself along the path.

I can't even clearly express to myself what it is I'm trying to figure out.

I want to be certain of things again. It has it's own sense of secruity being certain. It's like I am a giant emotional and psychologial piece of silly putty and someone out there is pulling me in all directions.

I need a time out in this game of life so I can collect myself and figure out the next strategy of play.

— Kareen
Tue, Mar 21^st, 2006 · 10:23pm ↑

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